NEATS
Ace of Hearts Records
1981-1984 The Ace of Hearts Years
22-song CD
I had definitely heard good things about Neats over the years, but had never gone back to check out their catalog. This collection of recordings from their years on the Ace of Hearts label just goes to show how dumb I was for waiting this long to give them a spin. My immediate reaction is that their urgent yet melodic post-punk sounds like the lovechild of the Modern Lovers and Mission of Burma. And if that doesn’t sound good to you, then I can only assume that you hate awesome rock ’n’ roll. The first seven songs are from the EP entitled The Monkey’s Head in the Corner of the Room, and while of each of those songs has a killer groove, it’s the following ten numbers from the self-titled LP that shine the brightest. It’s here that the band’s chops truly come into focus. Eric Martin’s vocals become both more nuanced and more expressive. “Sad” features a great bass melody from Jerry Channel, and Terry Hanley’s propulsive drumming kills throughout, particularly on “A.B.D.,” the disc’s standout track. This compilation is a must-have for anyone coming late to the Neats’ party. (Kevin Finn)

REVERSE
Curve of the Earth
Monkey Mind
11-song CD
From its opening seconds—ineffable barbarian yawp amid carefully planned mayhem that somehow manages to come across as gloriously zany and winningly gratuitous, opening salvo “Fluorescent” is far more than mere alterna-fodder. And the winning trend continues on “Victoria,” which is an eerie assemblage of broken tropes: a melodically memorable vocal line is slurred and crooned over meat and potatoes drums and strangely telegraphic guitar and surging and lapping bass. (Equally fine is the careering declamatory over blurting guitar featured on the outstanding title track.) The liquescent and chillingly melodic “White Wall” is worthy of, though in no way similar to, some of the softer excursions of XTC, and the stop-and-start dynamic of “One Drop” is alternately frantic and ecstatic. If any band has heeded the admonition to make it new, it’s this one: note how “Come On” has a classic hooky riff that the band warps through some kind of hard rock funnel, where it emerges from the other end as some kind of mirror image folk-murk, then back again it goes through the power chord mixmaster. Then, before you know it, the whole album is...over. That’s it. Not all the songs reach the heights, but even the less than top-flight tracks, like “Blues in D,” and the mostly astonishing “Slow” are inventively textured and arranged. There is artistry awfully close to brilliance fit to burst all through this inconsistent, but, at its best, remarkable album. Highly recommended. (Francis DiMenno)

CHIEF KOOFFREH
Star Top Songs 3
7-song CD
Chief Kooffreh from Lawrence, Massachusetts, is a trip. He starts each tune introducing himself and reminding us of the millions of fans also listening in with us. He gets a basic Casio rhythm rolling for the beat behind his sing/speak lyrics on subjects of his concern. The main theme on this CD is equal rights for Latinos. It’s his choice of words and extremely sparse production (by Jason Duguay of Project Sound) that give these songs a whole lotta character. A smile comes on my face when the chief hits the chorus and a slap back echo enhances his African accent: “we are Latinos/ We do our business/ We pay our taxes/ We love America.” Note that four of the seven songs on this CD are different but similar versions on the Latino subject. He also does a worldwide tribute to Bono of U2 for being great humanitarian and throws in a shaming attack on bad policemen who are out of control. The CD ends on a harsh note with Chief Kooffreh insisting that Alley Cat should get out of his house—“hit the road, pack your things bitch, you are dangerous, lose the number.” I love his style—but my girlfriend doesn’t. If you like unique character, give the chief a try. (T Max)

HANDS AND KNEES
Midriff Records
Et tu, Fluffy
11-song CD
Ah, yes, Mrs. Slimedog here, the most exciting, innovative, knowledgeable, modest writer of the Noise. I’m debonair and dashing and write scathing, riveting reviews. Now, let us point our ears and hearts toward the toxic of disruption. This CD is full of “jangly pop with some of the catchiest melodies and foot stomping rhythms.” “Oh, boy,” I say, time for some Loggins and Messina or Bob Seger! But instead I get some of that weirdo indie (bellybutton) music.

But fear not, when this band gets rocking they sound like the Pixies or X, according to Slimedog who says they are ’80s bands, (I assume they must be New Romantic bands). It’s a bit hit and miss when the band slows down but mostly this is rather lovely stuff. I’d much rather listen to this than Rammstein, that French band those silly boys like Slimedog and Zortar listen to. (Mrs. Slimedog)

DAVID GREENBERGER & PAUL CEBAR Pel Pel Recordings
Cherry Picking Apple Blossom Time
38-song CD
This spoken word project features monologues by Greenberger, widely known for his magazine Duplex Planet, in which he transcribes interviews with denizens of nursing homes. Paul Cebar and assorted side-persons provide the musical accompaniment, which ranges from folk-tinged to bluesy to jazzy to exotica, but is uniformly fine no matter the idiom. As for the monologues, one is reminded of Ring Lardner; nearly all are poignant and insightful slices of receding Americana. Greenberger does not aim for cutesy; nor does he gloss over the travails of old age, lonely or otherwise. He is the master of the ordinary, which, when taken far enough, becomes profoundly weird and beautiful. Greenberger has been doing this sort of fieldwork for around 30 years, and it’s invaluable. What’s more, he’s made it into an art. Someone should give this guy a MacArthur genius grant, already. (Francis DiMenno)

UNDO
9.19.99
8-song CD
Ambient, experimental, and electronic— all terms to describe UNDO, a native of London, England, residing in West Roxbury. MA. Produced by Woolly Mammoth Studios, the disc features an approach to guitar that “doesn’t really sound like a guitar thanks to little pedals and delays.” Furthermore, intertwining themes are meant for listeners to formulate “mental imagery to accompany their experience of the music.” These are atmospheric compositions, perfect for film-scores and media use. Being conducive to thoughtfulness and emotion, the disc is also appropriate “background” music. The “masked” man behind the “unguitar” is without a doubt skilled in his craft. With perseverance and a little luck, he just may get the break he deserves. (Julia R. DeStefano)

THE BYNARS
Party All Nite
7-song CD
The album’s title track and kickoff point reminded me a lot of Weezer. Unfortunately, it reminded me of post-Pinkerton Weezer. The song is too overly precious and too self-conscious in its pop culture references. Fortunately for me, as well as anyone else who picks up this record, there are six more songs on here, each of which delivers a dose of pleasurable power pop, with just enough twists to keep things interesting. Lead singer Matt Jatkola’s nasally, creaky voice adds some real color, and maybe even a hint of danger, throughout the proceedings. “I Know You’re Wrong” features some intriguing interplay between Jatkola’s guitar and Ben Mettey’s synth, and Kiel Szivos’ bass breaks on “Rhyme Song” provide a nice diversion from what could have been an overly formulaic song. The lesson to learn here, kids, is to listen to the whole record and not make snap judgments after just one song. (Kevin Finn)

ENDWAY
Running Man
8-song CD
What’s not to love about a band whose members live to play rock ’n’ roll, and who like to give away their music for free? With three albums already under their belt, EndWay is an evolved, melodic synthesis of Maroon 5, Sublime, and the current incarnation of INXS. Known for the vibrancy of their live performance, the band’s music has also been featured on MTV’s The Real World, Road Rules, and The Hills, to name a few. Vocalist Morgan Dorr’s tonality is “dynamic” and “soul-infused,” comparable to that of Coldplay’s Chris Martin. The opener, “Love Again,” is intriguing. Electronic elements permeate throughout; the result is ear pleasing and polished. In the realm of Jason Mraz, “Coolin’ Out” is optimistic and carefree, while the acoustic twang of “Wine, Women & Cheese” is a fitting end to a pleasant (but all-too-short) disc. Indeed, “Love is a friend we all need in the end.” (Julia R. DeStefano)

THE JAYBIRDS
Rose Petals
9-song CD
I’m about to say something I don’t say often in my reviews for the Noise: I really actually like this band! They play mellow, bittersweet folk rock. I can’t even pick a favorite song because they’re all (mostly) so good. My only complaint is that a few of the songs suddenly break into passionate, fast-paced bridges and I think it sort of kills the laid-back, lamenting vibe of the album. Also, there’s one song, “My Lady,” that has a different singer, and I find it kind of disruptive and jarring to the flow of the CD; I don’t really like the guy’s voice and musically the song is boring, so it’s kind of a blemish on an otherwise great CD. Overall, though, I’m enthusiastically a new fan of the Jaybirds. (Emsterly)

CRAIG RANGE
Visualize
11-song CD
Nimble but somewhat anodyne pop-jazz with man-size dollops of funk. Skillfully burbled out and certainly adequate for them as hanker for such. Odd, however, that Mr. Range’s own vocal range so often verges on strained. Furthermore, even gorgeously pretty vocal melodies like “That’s Life” and “That’s Enough” seem marred by the curse of over-earnestness—to say nothing of the message song “Rodney.” And “Don’t Stop” sounds an awful lot like it wants to horn in on George Benson’s act (not that there’s anything wrong with that). Also, “Hurry Your Trip” sounds like a passing strange amalgam of Stevie Wonder and the Grateful Dead, if one can even dare to imagine such a thing. (Francis DiMenno)

GASLIGHT REVIVAL
Drift
12-song CD
Greetings, Zortar here, alien from another planet and the original balloon boy. Now, if someone could just put Slimedog in a balloon up out of the stratosphere that would be a great accomplishment for your species. I’m once more inhabiting his slimy, salacious, sacrilegious, scab infested vessel while gearing up for my winter job of driving an ice cream truck through the safe and clean streets of Boston.

So this CD was created by two lads who say they play “in the vein of Ryan Adams and Wilco,” which means country rock but in a modern way, maybe alternative country is the current term. They got them some fiddles and acoustic guitars and perform them as well as a hickleburrow on a July moon’s creek but it’s just too snoozy for an intergalactic floozy like me. But if’n y’all like this sorta stuff you might want to check this out. At their best they recall Cracker, but for me I’ll be blasting Rammstein through the slushy streets of Boston this winter. (Slimedog)

ERIC BETTENCOURT
Shadow Shine Records
The Giraffe Attack Collection
11-song CD
Let me say that I am fully aware of Mr. Bettencourt’s displeasure with his previous review and that he had hoped to get a better reviewer than Joe Coughlin the next time around. Well, as much as I wonder who would want anyone but the esteemed Mr. Coughlin to review a CD, the task is now mine. In fairness, I listened to this CD with an open mind. Clearly, a lot of work went into this. The songs are well-crafted with plenty of hooks. The musicianship is superior and the arrangements are interesting. The vocals, are, well, quite lush. Overall, songwriter/guitarist/vocalist Eric Bettencourt’s sound seems influenced by the late ’60s Beatles, and the Band, of which the fun “Lost Weekend” is a prime example. I also like the mariachi-ish trumpet in “Empty Sidewalks.” Although this CD has a lot in its favor, as a whole it’s so entangled in its own lushly layered vocals that they overwhelm and choke off all the good parts. It’s just too much. Less would definitely have been a lot more. (Robin Umbley)

STEVEN PAUL PERRY
The Human Condition
12-song CD
This is a grab bag of styles mostly ranging from blues-based quasi-Americana to anthemic mainstream rock. The pretty R&B balladry of “Blue Light” is touching in spite of its familiar theme of the splendors and miseries of a performer’s life, and the upbeat “Love Me, Love You” is irresistible high bombast. However, for the most part, Mr. Perry’s tales of solipsism and woe, such as are on abundant display throughout, howsoever gorgeously or ingeniously framed they may be, may have a hard time finding a friend in the current marketplace. (Francis DiMenno)

FORGETFUL JONES
Sub-Atomic Philharmonic
12-song CD
Straight from their one-sheet, Forgetful Jones is a “melodic, heavy rock ’n’ roll band with one goal in mind: to create quality music.” In a sound described as “signature,” genres of funk, reggae, and blues are also blended throughout. Nothing here is particularly innovative or memorable, but if the band has been privileged to play alongside rock-greats Alice in Chains… they must be doing something right. Apparently, radio airplay is also plentiful, as is television exposure. If they really are, as their MySpace states, a “sound that’s long overdue,” they will have to prove it. Frankly, I need more convincing to believe such a bold statement. (Julia R. DeStefano)

THE DAILY PRAVDA
Special edition pre-release
Burning Bible Diamonds
10-song CD
Slick but rote ’90s-era potpourri-pop with smidges of Bowie/Queen-style glam and creampuff metal. But there is little here to truly catch the ear and less to actually engage the listener. Even the light touches—the Cars-oid synth on “September” and the ostinado on “So In Love”; the theremin on “Waiting There for You,” or the Beatles-manque sound of “Dead House”—come across as ponderous. And what’s with these references to the Velvet Underground and the Beach Boys already? These talented folks can do texture—no mean trick. But they would be better served if they turned their back on musical and lyrical cliches and twee, bombastic psuedo-profundity like “The Stiffs” and actually stretched for more lasting and profound tunesmithing, like they seem to be reaching for on “Holidays on the Run.” (Francis DiMenno)

 

 

LANDED
Corleone Records
Liver and Lungs
6-song CD
Formed over twelve years ago, Landed has returned to form, bringing their noise/rock/techno/electronic/art full circle with this latest collection of politically charged social commentary. Their message is a mirror to a society that has become obsessed with drugs, government corruption, and fear of a global meltdown. There is as much ear candy as there is message, which makes this album as much a piece of art as it is an exercise in its illustration of a failed culture. Favorite tracks include “Blow Your Burger” and “Osama Oxycontin.” Fans of Out of Band Experience, the Residents, Captain Beefheart, and Happy the Clown will love this album. The use of chemicals is strongly encouraged. I listened to this on Lemon Pledge and I still can’t find my underwear. (Joel Simches)

CALIFORNIA SMILE
Limbus Infantus Records
Roof Came Off House
6-song CDThis is the second album from the Providence-based California Smile. I have heard millions of instrumental albums from New England in my life. A small percentage have gone beyond showing off their instrumental prowess and written great albums, like the National Blue and Cancer Conspiracy. What is the magic formula? Mission of Burma once sang of “the virtues of restraint.” I think California Smile got the message. They can knock you over with heaviness, odd time signatures, virtuosity, and endless guest musicians, and, at times, they do. They also know when to back off and let the piano play alone again, naturally. This CD is a little bit ELP, Van Der Graaf Generator, Gong, Guru Guru, and Mogwai. It’s a solid effort that explodes across the New England sky. (Eric Baylies)

CEMETERY SUPERFLY
Green Banshee Music
Ghost In The Radio
6-song CD
The follow-up to their full length, No Commercial Potential, seems to have a lot of commercial potential after all. This latest snippet into band’s fifteen-year catalog brings a new energy, a new drummer, and a decidedly straight-ahead rock approach to the mix. Picture Metallica’s “Black Album” combined with Alice In Chain’s Dirt and Pink Floyd’s Momentary Lack of Reason put into a pop blender and served with a silly straw and it will sound a lot like this. While not as quirky and undefined as their earlier releases, the band still likes to play with your head, the most interesting part of this being the three-part concept piece, “World Without End.” It would be a fun ride to explore a concept album with this band, but sadly we don’t quite get one here. This EP leaves me wanting more, which is not necessarily a bad thing in this case. (Joel Simches)

AWAIT RESCUE
Hold the Ground Sampler
3-song CDThis music wishes it could be as heavy and anthemic as bands like Incubus, Mars Volta, and Mastadon, but winds up being a pale, suburban carbon copy of the above without capturing the raw energy that makes these bands so blatantly inimitable. That is not to say the music isn’t tight, well played, or intricate. It is. It is also quite listenable as such, but I am left wanting to hear some original edge, or some inexorable energy that would make me care about this music enough to listen to more than these three songs. This band needs to stop trying so hard to emulate and just do what they feel. The third song comes close to giving us that, but by then it is too little and too late. I have already pressed eject. (Joel Simches)

AND NOW FOR SOME LOCAL HOLIDAY RECORDS,
NEW AND OLD

THREE DAY THRESHOLD & SUMMER VILLIANS
Christmas & Holidays Songs volume 1
12-song online
Christmas greetings, Zortar here, alien from another planet inhabiting the worthless tick infested body of Slimedog once again. We also have a Christmas celebration on my planet, but ours is a materialistic celebration designed for wholesale stores to make enough money so they can stay open at our mosques (we call them malls) the rest of the year.
So this is a collection of original country Christmas songs spearheaded by well known local country/rock band Three Day Threshold and though I’ll stick with Charles Brown when I want my Christmas music, this is an amusing, irreverent take on the genre.
My favorite songs on this on-line CD are “Let’s Get Cozy,’ an update of “Baby, It’s Cold Outside,” where a kind gentleman is unsuccessful in offering his body warmth to a lady and “A Very Whisky New Year,” about what the holidays mean for most of us, namely a time to overindulge. Cheers! (Slimedog) 

THE WEISSTRONAUTS StereOrrific
I’m Dreaming of The Weisstronauts’ Christmas
5-song CD
Pete Weiss rounds up the cowboys (and gals), takes ’em surfin’ in December, and ends up with this rightly styled circle o’ plastic, just the right size for a Christmas present. Light a fire and kick back to the surf-country feel of “Jingle Bells.” If you want to get up for some swing dancin’, try “Nuthin’ Comin’ Good This Christmas.” But if that tuckers you out, kick off yer spurs and lie back down in front of the fire for “Silent Night, ” and make note of what those children want for Christmas. Remind them what the holiday is really about—“Sweet Baby Jesus”—a tune with a nice ’60s pop progression (like the Beatles’ “Eight Days A Week”) that breaks down into a rambling vocal jam and ends with sweet harmonies. We go live into a club for the final holiday party, where Mel Weiss remembers to put the Santa back in Christmas (“Santa Baby”). So who is the real baby of Christmas—Jesus or Santa? And can you really hang 10 if you’ve got cowboy boots on? This disc won’t help you decide—but when you hear someone yell “surf’s up” in December, remove yer spurs… and sing along. (T Max)

TOTARO
Spank Dawg
Christmas Carols
12-song CD
This is a Christmas CD. Can it get any worse? Why am I listening to this? OUCH!!!! MY EARS ARE BLEEDING!! They fucken’ hurt now! I am starting to feel sick—I feel as if I am slipping away. I was once normal but now I fade in and out of normalcy and recently things have gotten worse. I don’t sleep anymore. I have given up on sleeping because it’s a waste of time and because I just lie there thinking about the end of the world and how we on a downward spiral. Not taken over by Zombies but by the very wealthy whose ideals are completely demented and distorted sort of like these Christmas songs. It was the Christians who have caused ninety percent of the earth’s catastrophes and mass murders so I don’t want to sing or listen to any of their songs. Soon they will take over the planet and make everyone dress like Ronald Reagan, believe in a false idol and follow a restrictive set of laws. Good luck to us all. (Leonid)

NRBQ Clang!
Christmas Wish—Deluxe Edition
19-song CD
As proud owner of the band’s self-titled 1969 Columbia debut, I’m well aware of how much irreverent fun NRBQ can summon up, and as a big fan of such, I was all over this release like white on rice. It’s essentially a CD version of their 1986 Mini-LP on Rounder, and the tracks from the original album are the strongest: picture Brian Wilson producing and arranging Randy Newman and you get a bit of their flavor. This update has ten new live and studio sides attached. Some are snippets, and other full-blown, um, versions—like, dig the instrumental take of “Christmas Wish” and the twisted cover of that good ole Charlie Brown Xmas fave, and the anomic scorching of poor old Mel Torme’s “chestnuts roasting on an open fire.” Who will this record bug? Superannuated grandfolk who expect croony goop to continually exude from their creaky hi-fis come Yuletide. Headbangers, goths, and sick babies who instinctively fear anything with whimsical texture and/or jazzy chops. Gloomy fundamentalists who are convinced that anything mostly secular is a Mephistophelean passport to hellfire. Who will it delight? Nearly everybody else in the world, I would hope. (Francis DiMenno)

VARIOUS ARTISTS
Sonic Trout
Another Christmas Gift For You
21 songs
As someone who hates Christmas, and REALLY hates Christmas music, this is a perversely enjoyable surprise. Sonic Trout are label-hosts mainly to Chandler Travis Philharmonic and The Incredible Casuals, but many a furry friend and oddball offshoot are featured here to stellar effect. The main reasons it works so well are, A) the songs which DO mention Christmas are great enough on their own that the context is completely negligible, whereas B) the unavoidably thematic ones are so charmingly fucked that you could never, say, play them at the office holiday party without getting fired (Rikki & Johnny's cordially alien "Sleigh Ride," among others). In these instances alone, you're getting significantly toasted entertainment which never condescends, yet which works beautifully if you ever got the actual seasonal itch for some reason, and yet AGAIN, would sound great any time o' year regardless. How many NON-Christmas records can you say all that about? And yet, aside from some masterful power-pop, there are drippingly surreal jazz warps, perfectly lovely little choral treatments, waltzes with accordions, and a number of things no one's ever tried before. My only beef is the three minutes of silence two-thirds in for no good reason. Otherwise, a swell thing that'll sound just as good in July, which I guess makes it a pretty good Christmas present after all. (Joe Coughlin)

THE BLACKSTONE VALLEY SINNERS
Valley Records
The Cold Hard Truth About Christmas
12-song CD
Most Christmas albums are take-it-or-leave it affairs, strictly for seasonal listening, but this one is an exception. At its best, this Rich Gilbert-fronted and Pete Weiss produced collection is a shit-kicking, yodel-happy, steel-guitar slathered romp, with at least one brand-new certified bonafide Yule-or-anytime classic, “Katie Dang,” evocative of a cross between the Notorious Byrd Brothers LP and Pure Prairie League’s “Amie.” And “Song of the Desert” is at least the spiritual step-son of Hank Williams’ “Kaw-Liga.” Not all of this CD works as well, but tell me this: is it possible that the western swing stylings of “Jingle Bell Rock” aren’t to your taste? Could it be that the well-nigh irresistible 1950s Doris Day ska rendition of “Mary’s Boy Child” doesn’t tickle your innards? And does the mind roasting rockin’ 48-second intro to “Feliz Navidad” leave you cold? Then all I can say to you, my friend, is this: bah, humbug. (Francis DiMenno)

VARIOUS ARTISTS
Greetings From Music Lane
4-song CD
This Christmas CD features a variety of artists collaborating on reinterpretations of Christmas songs. SuperPower covers "White Christmas" decently as a lo-fi punk number. Jose Ramos with Howard Teasley presents a bluesy "Merry Xmas, Baby." Apart from a quick and random insertion of "hey baby come over here" in Spanish and a cheerful send-off at the end as well, the song isn't of much interest. Daisycutter, which appears twice with several guests, gives a funny technopop take of "Santa Claus" (the one where he "comes to town"). Their techno/goth/metal version of "Silent Night" steals the show hands down. It almost makes me want to go to church. Almost. Now I have to go listen to Cradle of Filth. Merry Walpurgisnacht! (Z)

BLEU (with lots of guest stars)
Maid
Bing Bang Holidang
10-song CD
Bleu has put together an entire 10-song Christmas album featuring reinvented standards along with a handful of original seasonal tunes. Packed with an impressive cast of Boston-bred celebrity cameos (Dicky Barrett, Bill Janovitz, Kay Hanley, Jason Kendall, Mary Lou Lord, Jed Parish, and Ramona Silver, to name a few) and a worthy charity’s cause, Bleu has managed to produce a record as musically diverse as it is timely.
Bleu combines a stylistic range reminiscent of Beck with the kitsch of sugar-voiced crooner Bing Crosby. His studio skill evident in the record’s varied and individually strong instrument and vocal sounds, Bleu also proves himself adept in modern dance beats and production. This is particularly noteworthy in his version of “Jingle Bells” which features an old Andrews Sisters vocal sample over a house beat.
Also worth mentioning is “The Twelve Days Of Christmas,” which features the majority of the record’s cameo appearances. Bleu has each singer interpret their “day” over music representing the band’s style and frequently uses the band name. The song is played as a bluesy rocker and stretches on too long, but such is its nature. There are a few lackluster cameos, but simply put, the song separated the singers from the vocalists. Holistically, it gets an A for effort. Personally, my choice for the hit on this record is the original “Snow Day.” An up-tempo pop song in the style of earlier Elvis Costello, it has a big hook and the added push of a chorus reinforced by a mob of kids screaming.
Bing Bang Holidang begins and ends with Bleu’s tribute to Bing Crosby, adding his own cleverly effected vocals over sampled big band music and electronic beats. Crossing genres throughout the record, Bleu proves himself an intelligent and well-rounded musician. All proceeds go to the Boston Institute for Arts Therapy, a local charity that provides therapy to mentally handicapped kids, abandoned children, teenage mothers, and others. (Danimal)

PAULA KELLEY & THE MISFIT TOYS
Why Christmas? (the longest day of the year)
3-song CD
Paula Kelley writes some of the slickest pop songs you’ll ever hear. On this adorable slice of holiday heaven, the honey voiced chanteuse offers up “Why Christmas (the longest day of the year),” an original Christmas song as sweet and addictive as candy kisses. This tribute to holiday insanity is worthy of any Phil Spector jewel as delivered by any ’60s girl group, and the message is as wonderfully Scrooge-ish as The Waitresses’ staple, “Christmas Wrapping.” On the chorus, Paula is joined by The Misfit Toys, a talented mob that includes Aaron Tap, Lisa McColgan, Corin Ashley, Linda Bean, and Ad Frank. Also check out the faithful rendition of “Blue Christmas,” and an unlisted bonus track: the Misfit Toys’ all-humming version of “Hark, the Herald Angels Sing” speckled with boozy-sounding flubs and giggles. It ends with Paula saying “Should we try to get it right or not?” and somebody yelling, “Shut up, what do you mean!?” Pure fun! (Lexi)

VARIOUS ARTISTS
Gulcher Records
Xmas Snertz – Have a Very Gulcher Christmas
16-song CD
This eclectic Christmas Sampler from Gulcher Records contains four songs of local interest. Mach Bell (of Thundertrain and Joe Perry Project fame, and more recently of Mach V) contributes the very entertaining “C’mon Santa.” Bell earns his surname by beating his cowbell throughout this track, and also adds some harmonica. But it’s his voice that really puts this one over the top – a voice that conjures an image somewhere between the little boy on Santa’s lap and the lecherous old man trying to get little girls to sit in his lap. Musically, the song is a one riff rip-off of Van Morrison’s “Gloria,” and Bell’s lyrical list of Christmas wishes is as much a tribute to ’50s and ’60s pop culture as it is to Christmas. Kenne Highland & His Vatican Sex Kittens contribute the raunchy “Can I Please Crawl Down Your Chimney?”, in which we find Mr. Highland doing his finest Iggy Pop imitation. Stanton Park Records mogul Aram Heller contributes a spine melting guitar solo, while Carl Biancucc and the rest of the Sex Kittens provide a gritty but solid foundation. Highland also lends his vocal chords to The Korps, led by Ken Kaiser, who sings “The Blizzard of ’78” in a style that makes me think of Jonathan Richman hooking up with ShaNaNa. Kaiser’s band, X-Ray Tango close out the collection with a surf-guitar instrumental version of “We Three Kings of Orient Are.” Not necessarily guaranteed to put you in the holiday spirit, this collection is a lot of fun in any event. (Brian Mosher)

VARIOUS ARTISTS
Q Division Records
Viva Noel—A Q Division Christmas
15 holiday songs
Q Division has built itself up as one of Boston’s best record labels and recording studios. A Q Division Christmas, a holiday collection assembled in 1999, was their first foray into the world of compilations. On the first track Jen Trynin gracefully tackles the old chestnut, “The Christmas Song” making it her own with a unique voice that adds a new edge to the song. With “2000 Miles,” Merrie Amsterburg accompanies her amazing vocals with mandolins that help create a dreamy soundscape to a song that was also done by The Pretenders. You can hear the longing in her voice when she sings, “The snow is falling down/ It’s colder day by day/ I miss you/ I can hear people singing/ It must be Christmas time.” By covering the Elvis staple, “Blue Christmas,” The Gentlemen have big balls but get credit for not attempting to copy the King’s version. Lead singer, Mike Gent does a sarcastic deadpan vocal take and even though he’s a bit plodding, he creates his own unique take on the song. Singer Brian Stevens (Cavedogs) brings good feelings on “The Christmas Waltz/ Tinsel (Medley),” with a waltzing melody that recalls a night of spiked eggnog and embarrassing dance moves. The Sheila Divine offer up a smooth version of “O Holy Night” that at times is boringly true to the standard with only a few instances of actually picking up a bit of steam. Local legend Aimee Mann performs the second version of “The Christmas Song” on the CD and manages not to create overkill. Ms. Mann’s version has a nice jazz feel to it. Creating a kooky edge to the CD, The Gravel Pit playfully cover “Marshmallow World,” a Phil Spector-era nugget with a great big kick and spin. You’ll want to run down the street proclaiming the joys of Christmas, oh it is indeed a wonderful life! The CD closes with The Gravy contributing easily the strangest addition with “Mele Kalikimaka.” Lead singer Todd Spahr goes into his alter ego Fatty Pineapple for an eccentric version of “The Hawaiian Christmas Song.” This would not be out of place on Dr. Demento’s radio show. On an honorable note, all proceeds from the sale of the CD are going to the Mark Sandman Music Education Fund. For more information on the fund go to www.morphine3.com. With great music and a good cause, it’s another quality release from Q Division Records and an important holiday addition to your CD collection. (Simon Cantlon)

THE SHOWCASE SHOWDOWN
TaRio Records
“Ho Ho Ho Chi Minh” b/w “Merry Christmas, I Fucked Your Snowman”
2 holiday songs on red 7” vinyl
Since I recorded the songs (“Ho Ho Ho Chi Minh” and “Merry Christmas, I Fucked Your Snowman”) at Straighjacket Sound Studios in Allston, I probably can’t do an unbiased “real review” of the record without going on and on about how great the engineer is (ME) and how FUN the band was to record. It was cut raw, live, and fast. Vocal crooner Ping Pong overdubbed sleigh bells (that lock-groove loop at the end of the record) after the guitar, bass, drums were laid down by band members: Cloherty, Victoria, and Chez Nips. Although most of the bands I recorded back then were way heavier and weirder, there was just something about the kooky pop punk of The Showcase Showdown that was lovable. The record was released in time for Christmas 1995 on 7-inch 45 rpm red vinyl record (TaRio Records). I am mostly a Scrooge, but whenever I see a snowman, I just grin and hum the chorus… “Merry Christmas, I fucked your snowman”—but since the actual verse lyrics are pretty tame, I suggest you add your own x-rated ones. (Bill T Miller)

VARIOUS ARTISTS
Volunteer Records
Ho Ho Ho Spice
40-songs 2 CDs set
Christmas compilations, especially those whose proceeds go to charity, tend to be spotty, at best: Lots of songs, only a few worth a first listen. The Del Fuegos track “That Punchbowl Full of Joy,” is fun, but with the list of bands on this CD consisting of such worth while notables as the dB’s, Klark Kent, and NRBQ, I’m surprised Volunteer Records couldn’t find anyone aroud Boston more currently buzzworthy. But, then again, it is a Christmas compilation for a charitable cause. Some songs are cool, but most of them are forgettable throwaways. So if you like hospice care and dig the Del Fuegos, go for it. (Joel Simches)