By T Max and Joe Coughlin

Back 20 years ago we did more than 10 issues a year, so in this 5/10/15/20 I want to catch up on the issues that always get over looked—the January issues from 1990 and 1995. They will be mixed in with our regular batch of February issues from five, 10, 15, and 20 years ago.

Issue #91 January 1990

Cover: Jerry’s Kids

Bands: The Del Fuegos, Lemonheads, Dharma Bums, Sub Skin Cables, Slapshot, Volcano Sounds (an extension of Volcano Suns), Noise Poll, Lisa Suckdog, a/k/a Lisa Crystal Carver, who would go on to tour with Psychodrama and, later, Costes, publish the great Rollerderby zine, knock out a few fine books, and (today) remain a popular web presence on sites such as salon.com with her unique been-there-and-back style of sympathetic writing (yeah, I’m a fan).

Gossip & Stuff: In the Noise Poll, Bullet La Volta, Pixies, and the Bags place one, two, and three in the best-established band category. Think Tree’s “Hire a Bird” wins best single. Billy Ruane is the personality of the year, and Peter Prescott is elected into the Noise Hall of Fame. Ruane’s acceptance, uh, “speech” at the awards show remains scorched into memory. Words can’t explain it (perhaps just as well), but let’s just say that some people were in stitches, some were screaming and running away, and a mop was briefly deployed afterward.

Cover: Birdsongs of the Mesozoic

Bands: The Moving Targets, the Neighborhoods, Titanics, Volcano Suns, the Bags, the Slaves, All Mod Cons, No Man’s Band, Dambuilders, Gigolo Aunts, Johnny & the Jumper Cables, Smack Tan Blue, Tribe

Gossip & Stuff: The Fools are touring with John Entwistle. *** The Cavedogs are signed to Epic Records. *** The Channel goes bankrupt. Sympathies go out to anyone who checked out the strip club that briefly occupied the space afterwards. *** GG Allin is in jail in Chicago and it looks like he’ll be signing with Enigma Records when he is released. The signing didn’t happen, but some would argue that none of GG’s records were ever released—they escaped.

Issue #146 January 1995

Cover: Letters to Cleo, Charlie Chesterman

Bands: Opium Den, the 360’s, Holy Cow, Mistle Thrush, Scarce, One of Us, Psycho, the Upper Crust, Tracy Bonham

Gossip & Stuff: The Question of the Month is: What experience has changed your life? Jennifer Trynin tells a tale of a woman trying to pick her up—the woman thought Jenn was a man; John Eye (One of Us) says he was hit by a car in 1989. While he mended he lost his woman. Then he discovered he could vent his frustration, anger, and pain in his music; Mikey Dee (WMFO) had his life change when he picked up the Neighborhoods’ "Prettiest Girl" single and decided he would become a drummer; Pat McGrath (Wheelers & Dealers) answer is one word—circumcision. No truth to the rumor that he had it reversed to relive the good old days.

Cover: Opium Den

Bands: Concussion Ensemble, Thalia Zedek, Women of Sodom, the Barnies, 6L6, Ken Chambers, Letters to Cleo, Powerman 5000, Bim Skala Bim, Stompbox, Orbit, Slapshot, the Flying Nuns, the Nines, Fuzzy

Gossip & Stuff: Matador Records has picked up the Flying Nuns, Fuzzy, and Come. *** Gigolo Aunts are on the Dumb & Dumber soundtrack. *** Slide gets a four star review from Billboard. *** Extreme gets a star on the walk of fame outside Tower Records in Boston. Are those stars still there? *** Brett Milano appears in a Women of Sodom show on the receiving end of an enema. Just being in the audience for them was like getting an enema (IMHO). I’m not up to date on the lingo thing—I gotta assume that mean “in my humongous orifice.”

Issue #198 February 2000

Cover: Blue Man Group, Godboy, Lifestyle

Bands: Binary System, Lovewhip, Scissorfight, Slide, All Mod Cons, Cherry 2000, Expanding Man, the Sugar Twins, the Shods, the Doom Buggies, Half Cocked

Gossip & Stuff: We’ve got ideas of how to make Valentine’s Day special. Cynthia von Buhler (Castle von Buhler) says to fill a bathtub with a ton of red Jell-O—then eat it off her body with a partner; Bruce Allen (Doom Buggies) is breaking up with his girlfriend (on his wife’s order); Andy Milk (Johnny Wishbone) says he’d get his partner to find the cheesiest hotel in town and set up a role-playing game that involved lingerie, bondage equipment, and other sexual devices; Its says here Joe that you intend to have your heart removed, stuffed, baked and served to anyone who’d like a bite. Did I really say that? I’d make that offer with a different organ now, but that there’s no holiday for it. People can call me on Thanksgiving if they’d like some extra stuffing, though.

Issue #248 February 2005

Cover: Count Zero, Violet Nine, Taxpayer, Noise Poll Results, Noiser’s Top Ten

Bands: The Rudds, Pixies, Mission of Burma, Andrea Gillis, the Blackjacks, Scamper, the Ducky Boys, the Information, the Dents, Tony Goddess, Fluttr, Upper Crust, World’s Greatest Sinners, the Marvels

Gossip & Stuff: Let’s see who did well in the poll—Darkbuster wins best live band, the Marvels CD, Cheat to Win, takes the best CD category (Did they cheat?), Robbie Roadsteamer wins male personality, Carmelita takes female personality, and Brett Milano sails into the Noise Hall of Fame. *** Joe, in this issue your top 10 mentions that Willie Alexander is still at it. Five years later in 2009 Willie releases four CDs in one year! As you well know, T, when you get to be our age, stuff just flies outta ya.