ABCDEFG—WHAT WAS YOUR MOST IMPORTANT?

Rita: No Lolita, you’ve totally missed the point. Womaning, as in a woman manning the helm. Lolita: But how could she womanage that with a baby in her arms? Rita: Forget it. Let’s get to our ABCs. Ask your friends to tell you about the most memorable letter they’ve ever received. Lolita: Oh, you know they’re all very smart. They’ll all say “A-plus.” I got a C-plus once. Okay, I know, enough rambling, I’ll ask your question about important letters. NICHOLE CLARKE (Orange Nichole): When I was in elementary school I received a letter from a convicted murderer in San Quentin prison.  Some older kids found his address in the back of High Times magazine and thought it would be funny to send him a fake letter from a college girl and sign my name and address.  My father didn’t find it so funny.  He wrote back to the guy to apologize for the older kids’ behavior.  I think the kids got suspended from school. *** ROGER C MILLER (Mission of Burma): Randy Black sent me a dream in the mail once.  I thought that was quite curious. *** JOHN POWHIDA (John Powhida International Airport): A coupla summers ago I received a Madonna postcard from radical feminist author and social critic Camille Paglia who wrote that she loved The Rudds cover of the material girl’s “Burning Up.”  She said she would mention our version of the song publicly and she freakin’ did about a year later in salon.com. *** JOE KOWALSKI (Onlyone/ Larry Banilow): Without a doubt, the most memorable letters were all the Double-Ds.  Wonderful letters, those are. *** CORIN ASHLEY (The Pills): It wasn’t that much of a letter, but when I was seven I wrote a fan letter to Evel Knievel and he replied with a short note and an autographed Harley Davidson catalog which he signed “Happy Landings, Evel.” It was about the biggest thing that had happened to me since birth, I can assure you. *** KEN FIELD (Revolutionary Snake Ensemble/ Birdsongs of the Mesozoic): I got a postcard from John Zorn saying he liked my first solo CD Subterranea.  That was pretty memorable. *** SAMMY MIAMI (Shööt The Möön); Sammy, God gave rock ’n’ roll to you! If I can do it, so can you. Keep going, keep playing. Best of Luck!  ~Paul Stanley  *** STEVE (My Own Worst Enemy): In high school I wrote to DJ Carter Alan at WBCN and thanked him for turning me onto the new sounds of U2 and The Alarm, and to complain about how no other kids at school understood my weird taste in new and punk music. He wrote back, told me to ignore the masses, to remain true to being an individual, and to be on the lookout for his favorite new band, Big Country. *** DAVID KIRKDORFFER (UNDO): Back in the ’90s the band I was in at the time, Little A, recorded a version of the Massachusetts state song for a compilation CD.  We sent a copy of the song to William Weld, then governor of Massachusetts.  He wrote back: “Your group is as creative and witty as it is gallant and refreshing.”  We got a kick out of that. *** LISA CONNOLLY (Corolla DeVille): My rejection letter from Berklee College of Music.  It definitely changed my direction for music education. Ultimately I learned everything I needed to know right here from scratch. So many Boston bands have been my teachers.  It just took me 30 years to get my degree and a job in my field. *** JAY MARTORANO (The Time Beings): I received a letter from the late and great Greg Shaw of Bomp!/Voxx records. When we were still rehearsing in my bedroom back in ’81, we sent Greg a demo cassette saying, “Greg, you’re our only hope.” We flipped out when we got a letter back from him saying he really liked us and to keep sending him tapes—basement quality or whatever, a lot of bands got their start on Bomp that way. To us it was like a letter from Brian Epstein! We eventually made it onto Voxx’s Beast From the East compilation of East Coast garage revival bands. *** TODD HARRIS (18 Wheels Of Justice): The most memorable letter I’ve ever received? That’s an easy one to answer. The “you are approved for Massachusetts unemployment benefits” letter—it was cause for celebration. That goes for the rest of the members in 18 Wheels too. We’ve ALL received that letter! Lolita: I feel so stupid. I totally misunderstood what kind of letter you meant. But now that I’ve got it, one of my high school football boyfriends received a big letter that he asked me to sew on his sweater. It was very memorable. Rita: Why, was that TOM BRADY? Lolita: No, it was memorable because I told Jimmy Finklestein that I wasn’t his fuckin’ slave and that he should fuckin’ sew on his own fuckin’ letter!  We broke up and I started dating the ultra cool lead guitarist of the NEW ORIGINALS. If any of our readers can name this guitarist and the famous band he later played for, I’ll dig up a very special reward.